†• Urban Legends - Sex •†

I have a Headache - A man and wife were supposed to go to a costume party together but when it came time for them to leave the woman said to go on with out her because she had a headache. The man finally left and the wife had been suspicious about him cheating so she put on a different costume and went to the party. When she got there she saw her husband dancing with a woman in a sexy costume. It made her a bit upset so she decided to slip in, she started dancing with him. Soon she had whispered in his ear that they should go sneak off to a bedroom. She made sure they left their masks on and they had sex. She then rushed home very mad at this point and waited for him to come home. When he got home, she asked if he had fun. He said no and that after a few minutes he and some other guys went across the street to play poker. He then added that the guy who had borrowed his comstume said he had a hell of a time though.

I have a Headache #2 - A husband and wife came home early one night to find their daughter having sex with her boyfriend on the couch. After the weird moments of dressing the boy went hom. The woman sat her daughter down for "the talk." When she got to the part about protection, the girl said not to worry because she had been using her mom's birth control pills. The mother asked hwy she had never noticed any missing. The daughter then told her that she had been replacing them with baby aspirin.

Honeymooners - A couple were celebrating their anniversary so they decided to stay in the same room where they had their honeymoon. The room was pretty much the same but there was a bit more wear and tear. The couple decided to use the machine that would play porno movies and they had realized that the room from the porno was the room that they were in. They had also realized that it was them from their honeymoon.

Pharmacist Help - A young boy was walking nervously around a pharmacy part of a store. The pharmacist asked the boy if he could help him. The boy wasn't sure what to say so he stumbled on his words a bit. The pharmacist grabbed a pack of condoms and asked the boy if that is what he was looking for. The teen said yes. The pharmacist was pretty amused and told the boy not to worry so much, he gave him some words of incouragement told the boy with a wink "I know you will become a regular customer." That evening the teen was feeling a bit more reassured and walked up to his girlfriend's door. But that confidence fadded when the father answered the door, it was the pharmacist with the reassuring advice.

Sneak In - A man had stayed out late one night and knew his wife would be mad. So he snuck in the window of their room to ravish her before she had a chance to be angry. His plan worked fine. Afterwords he went down stairs to get a drink, when he saw his wife sleeping on the couch. He asked rather urgently, "What are you doing down here?" She replied to him, "Shhhhh, my mom's sleeping upstairs in our bed."

Blind Man - A young woman was taking a shower when the doorbell rang. She jumped out to get it, but she couldn't find a towel. As she headed for her bedroom to grab something to wrap in, she called "Who's there?" A man answered back "The blind man." The woman assumed he just wanted to sell her somehting and figuring that he was blind, she didn't need to wrap up. So she answered the door. A man with a work uniform stood wide eyed and asked where she wanted her blinds hung.

Out Cold - A hotel worker had heard some screams for help from one of the hotel rooms. He got in the room to find a woman tied to the bed, and a man in a super hero costume who had hit his head during the sex game and left the poor woman helpless.

Love Bug - A young girl visits her doctor because she has had some itching in her private parts. She had never had sex with anyone but her boyfriend and was worried that he had given her something. After the doc examins her he says he will have to clal the police. He explains to her that she has maggots inside her and the only way that could happen is if her or her boyfriend had been having sex with corpses. She looked at the doctor horrified and faintly whispers "My boyfriend works in a morgue."

Go team! - A woman was doing her laundry in the basement of her apartment building early one morning. She had noticed that the robe she had been wearing was pretty durty itself. Since it was early, she decided that she could wash that too. She was standing there doing her laundry naked, when something dripped on her head. She had noticed some dirty water leaking from the celing abover her head. She found a childs football helmet in the corner of the room so she put it on to keep the water off her head. Just then a man walked in to read the meters, he looked at her with out even blinking and said "Lady, I don't know what kind of a game you are playing, but I sure hope your team wins!"

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